“There are unpeeled tomatoes in my omelet!” the angry American exclaimed, “I peeled them myself, where are my peeled tomatoes!”
The man was correct, I’d seen him peel the tomatoes in the kitchen. How insulted was the lady of the house at his actions on this beautiful lake in Colombia? An ugly American coming into her kitchen and demanding peeled tomatoes in his omelet. Unbelievably she didn’t understand English and he was forced to peel them himself.
He was as ugly an American as they come, retired, loud, and arrogant about his likes and dislikes. Why in the world wasn’t Colombia like his native Georgia?
Somehow unpeeled tomato slices appeared in his omelet after all his work. Did he miss something or was it done on purpose by a vengeful proprietress? He looked at me indignantly shouting about his unpeeled tomatoes as if I should share his distress. His wife was obviously used to this and patted his hand knowingly.
When I was young I had the opportunity to study in Communist Poland, the People’s Republic of Poland was its official name, but one thing was certain, the Republic didn’t belong to the people.
I was one of seven Americans studying there that summer along with a bunch of others students from all over the world, but mainly within the Soviet orbit. Bulgaria, Yugoslavia, and even Joseph from Ethiopia.
Joseph always wore a massive smile on his face. While most Poles went grimly about the business of trying to survive in a Socialist Economy that struggled to provide the bare necessities of food, clothing, and shelter for its people, Joseph was the happiest person in the world, unaffected by the problems around him. You would see him in the street and he always was beaming like he’d just won the lottery.
Over vodka in our dorm one night Joseph sat down and told us the story of how he ended up in Poland. At that time Ethiopia was ruled by hard core Communists. It’s hard to know what ruthless Capitalists the Communists were rebelling against as it was a poverty stricken nation. I guess the small shopkeepers on the corner were the bad guys.
Between a drought and Communist governance they managed to produce a famine of biblical proportions so bad that the whole world was forced to wake up and do something about it, part of it being the Live Aid concert.
Joseph’s parents were professors at the University which brought them under suspicion by the government as they were part of the hated intelligentsia. The government tried to be more Communist than Marx or more appropriately, than Stalin, with their only success being their own Red Terror that killed tens of thousands of people.
They passed a law that if anybody was ‘Anti-State’ you could kill them. With the result that some poor lady standing in line for food who mumbled, “There’s not enough bread in the stores” would have an undercover officer walk up and put a bullet through her head as she was ‘Anti-State’. Every morning the carts would come around to gather up the bodies of those unfortunates who had offended the government the night before.
Joseph’s father was the first arrested. They returned his mangled body to the family with the excuse that he’s been shot while resisting, except there were no bullet holes. A few weeks later the government didn’t even try and deny their crimes as his mother simply disappeared and the family was told she was executed for being ‘Anti-State’. I presume it was because she screamed objections during her torture.
Joseph was desperate. He knew the secret police would come for him next. He applied for a Student Visa from Poland and somehow got one. The Communist countries always made a big show of cross country Socialist cooperation with student exchanges, meetings, and great declarations of Socialist assistance to each other. This made for good PR, but accomplished little except photo ops, especially since underneath the veneer of Socialist Unity, many of the countries hated each other.
Joseph spent the next few weeks moving from house to house with the secret police hot on his tail.
Luckily in those days there were no efficient government systems to keep track of people and one hand didn’t know what the other was doing, especially in a country like Ethiopia. Unlike today where we have interlinked computer systems and cameras everywhere and can now ensure compliance with the most minor of government rules and regulations. A mecca of government control where nobody will ever dare engage in any activities deemed unacceptable by our divine, all-knowing, leaders.
So while the police were chasing him he applied for a passport to leave the country to study in Poland. He needed to give them the date of his departure so he purchased a plane ticket. They told him to come pick up his passport 24 hours before his flight.
Going to pick up his passport was harrowing. He didn’t know if somehow the police would get wind of his arrival and be there waiting for him. Almost worse, when he arrived, he was told that the passport wasn’t ready, he should go to the airport and it would be delivered an hour before his departure.
He spent the entire night awake with the nerve wracking knowledge that his very survival on this Earth depended on what happened the following morning.
The next day he arrived at the airport long ahead of time, he didn’t want to miss his passport. An hour before his flight there was no sign of his passport. Thirty minutes, still no passport. Ten minutes before his flight he was in tears. His life was finished, he was now out of places to hide. Everyone who assisted him was either arrested or warned not to assist him and threatened with arrest, he couldn’t put them in any more danger.
Then up walked someone with his passport, handed it to him, and he boarded his plane and flew to life and freedom, in the Communist dictatorship of the People’s Republic of Poland.
Cut irony with knife here --------------------------------------
We were struck silent when Joseph finished his story, he was grinning ear to ear. Finally my friend, Jim, turned to me and said, “You know, after hearing that, it’s going to be really tough going back to the United States and listen to someone complain about the paint job on their Mercedes.”
Or about the unpeeled tomatoes in their omelet.
The man was correct, I’d seen him peel the tomatoes in the kitchen. How insulted was the lady of the house at his actions on this beautiful lake in Colombia? An ugly American coming into her kitchen and demanding peeled tomatoes in his omelet. Unbelievably she didn’t understand English and he was forced to peel them himself.
He was as ugly an American as they come, retired, loud, and arrogant about his likes and dislikes. Why in the world wasn’t Colombia like his native Georgia?
Somehow unpeeled tomato slices appeared in his omelet after all his work. Did he miss something or was it done on purpose by a vengeful proprietress? He looked at me indignantly shouting about his unpeeled tomatoes as if I should share his distress. His wife was obviously used to this and patted his hand knowingly.
When I was young I had the opportunity to study in Communist Poland, the People’s Republic of Poland was its official name, but one thing was certain, the Republic didn’t belong to the people.
I was one of seven Americans studying there that summer along with a bunch of others students from all over the world, but mainly within the Soviet orbit. Bulgaria, Yugoslavia, and even Joseph from Ethiopia.
Joseph always wore a massive smile on his face. While most Poles went grimly about the business of trying to survive in a Socialist Economy that struggled to provide the bare necessities of food, clothing, and shelter for its people, Joseph was the happiest person in the world, unaffected by the problems around him. You would see him in the street and he always was beaming like he’d just won the lottery.
Over vodka in our dorm one night Joseph sat down and told us the story of how he ended up in Poland. At that time Ethiopia was ruled by hard core Communists. It’s hard to know what ruthless Capitalists the Communists were rebelling against as it was a poverty stricken nation. I guess the small shopkeepers on the corner were the bad guys.
Between a drought and Communist governance they managed to produce a famine of biblical proportions so bad that the whole world was forced to wake up and do something about it, part of it being the Live Aid concert.
Joseph’s parents were professors at the University which brought them under suspicion by the government as they were part of the hated intelligentsia. The government tried to be more Communist than Marx or more appropriately, than Stalin, with their only success being their own Red Terror that killed tens of thousands of people.
They passed a law that if anybody was ‘Anti-State’ you could kill them. With the result that some poor lady standing in line for food who mumbled, “There’s not enough bread in the stores” would have an undercover officer walk up and put a bullet through her head as she was ‘Anti-State’. Every morning the carts would come around to gather up the bodies of those unfortunates who had offended the government the night before.
Joseph’s father was the first arrested. They returned his mangled body to the family with the excuse that he’s been shot while resisting, except there were no bullet holes. A few weeks later the government didn’t even try and deny their crimes as his mother simply disappeared and the family was told she was executed for being ‘Anti-State’. I presume it was because she screamed objections during her torture.
Joseph was desperate. He knew the secret police would come for him next. He applied for a Student Visa from Poland and somehow got one. The Communist countries always made a big show of cross country Socialist cooperation with student exchanges, meetings, and great declarations of Socialist assistance to each other. This made for good PR, but accomplished little except photo ops, especially since underneath the veneer of Socialist Unity, many of the countries hated each other.
Joseph spent the next few weeks moving from house to house with the secret police hot on his tail.
Luckily in those days there were no efficient government systems to keep track of people and one hand didn’t know what the other was doing, especially in a country like Ethiopia. Unlike today where we have interlinked computer systems and cameras everywhere and can now ensure compliance with the most minor of government rules and regulations. A mecca of government control where nobody will ever dare engage in any activities deemed unacceptable by our divine, all-knowing, leaders.
So while the police were chasing him he applied for a passport to leave the country to study in Poland. He needed to give them the date of his departure so he purchased a plane ticket. They told him to come pick up his passport 24 hours before his flight.
Going to pick up his passport was harrowing. He didn’t know if somehow the police would get wind of his arrival and be there waiting for him. Almost worse, when he arrived, he was told that the passport wasn’t ready, he should go to the airport and it would be delivered an hour before his departure.
He spent the entire night awake with the nerve wracking knowledge that his very survival on this Earth depended on what happened the following morning.
The next day he arrived at the airport long ahead of time, he didn’t want to miss his passport. An hour before his flight there was no sign of his passport. Thirty minutes, still no passport. Ten minutes before his flight he was in tears. His life was finished, he was now out of places to hide. Everyone who assisted him was either arrested or warned not to assist him and threatened with arrest, he couldn’t put them in any more danger.
Then up walked someone with his passport, handed it to him, and he boarded his plane and flew to life and freedom, in the Communist dictatorship of the People’s Republic of Poland.
Cut irony with knife here --------------------------------------
We were struck silent when Joseph finished his story, he was grinning ear to ear. Finally my friend, Jim, turned to me and said, “You know, after hearing that, it’s going to be really tough going back to the United States and listen to someone complain about the paint job on their Mercedes.”
Or about the unpeeled tomatoes in their omelet.
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